AntiHippy.com

Although this video doesn’t state hippies, I feel as though it is beneficial for hippies to both watch and heed as hippies tend to smell like BO and patchouli:

WASH YO ASS!

I would take this guy as a pet as well:

smoking monkey - very funny

OK mom, your always trying to give me a pet. Well if you can find a murder monkey like this, I’ll go for it:

Time trave is:
A) Only allowed on weekends.
B) Only allowed by government officials.
C) Only attained by Star Trek Nerds.
D) The only way to guarantee winning the lottery.
E) What happens when you eat too many crayons and forget to wear your helmet when you walk down the hallway.

One of the things that I absolutely can’t stand is poor grammar, punctuation etc when using email or other web communication tools. The worst is when people post things in all CAPS. CAPS are useful if you want to draw attention, but they are the net equivalent to yelling. The worst are personal ads where everything is wrong. I find it offensive. This is an opportunity to make a first impression, and while reading miss spelled words, sentence fragments, trying to navigate poor punctuation, and all the while it’s in all CAPS doesn’t leave me with a good one. I suppose I should be grateful, these are obviously people I don’t want to talk to.

Dougie: I’m punching out expedites today like a Mexican picking fruit…

Strunk: We are getting to be like the OnStar for google.com…

Sleep is overrated…
Over and over again I attempted to type a capital 3 today and just kept making # signs… Again.
-Dougie

I hate Austin traffic…
“Why the fuck are you stopping!? There better be an overturned bus of dead girlscouts ahead or something!”
-Dougie

ITIL Training Sucks…
“Managing Shrinkage” That’s something to the effect of finding warmth, right?”
-Dougie

Funny…
Eli: you know, i paid $1.36 for this bagel downstairs
Eli: and i didn’t even get a complimentary blowjob
-Dougie

Not so much good beer…
Arthur: This tastes like pinecones…

Not in my world…
1:12:18 PM CEO: b/c no one thinks ahead
1:12:26 PM CEO: what’s easy == what’s best
1:12:42 PM CEO: == means is not equal in case you’re wondering
1:13:18 PM Engineer: actually != means is not equal in programing … == means is equal …. just fyi
1:13:34 PM CEO: not in my world, not in Java according to the guy that taught it to me

“I’ll go over there with a crowbar and rip that shit out…”

So I see this sign on my way in to the DC a while back that stated this church could improve your spirituality and physicality. So it’s the ‘Get right with God weight loss program’?

Dougie - “Why do they call them retards anyway? Are normal people tarded once and fucked up people get tarded again?”

Dougie - “So lets say Moses did part the Red Sea… What’s so impressive about that anyway? It’s like the kiddy pool of oceans…”

Anonymous - “i miss the straight foward ‘troubleshooting’…where it’s primarily
building a case to tell the customer that he is too stupid to own a
computer”

xxx: Need some information
(10:33:32) Doug: Radio Shack… You’ve got questions. They’ve got answers.
xxx: do they support dell 1950?

This proves that there are people out there with the same sentiment as myself: